Getting Pregnant with iPhone

Can we get cross the line into a little bit of nerd stuff real quick? I promise this kinda relates to baby making…

One of the many subjects in my RSS feed reader ( I am an info junkie) is mobile apps and gaming or, more specifically, apps and gaming of the iOS variety. I don't know whether you've crossed the Orwellian line into the smartphone racket or if you're holding onto that flip phone and raging against the machine. I do know that, for some reason, phone selection has become a heated issue, so even if you enjoy a different smartphone experience outside of Apple…this is available for you.

My wife and I pore over the trove of ovulation tracking and calendar applications. Period journals and fertility theories. We read different testimonials with the same doe eyed belief that the infomercial shoppers at 3AM experience when they know the Magic Bullet will revolutionize the way they eat and order four of them. (Is it really named after a Kennedy assassination thing?)

But now I bring you….BIRTH CONTROL!

So, basically, sperm rain down from the heavens and you mission is to maneuver the egg to avoid “the fertilizing power of the sperm!”

This game costs .99 cents, but fear not, my fellow frugals! There is also a lite version for us more discerning shoppers who wish to sample the gameplay before investing. I took the liberty of trying this out for you.

You are welcome.

The description minces no words. You have to tilt your device side to side, which moves the egg from the paths of the falling sperm. If one touches the egg, you “lose a life.” Never fear: birth control pills and condoms (not sure why condoms?) also fall and if you collect those, you gain life. I believe I played this game for roughly ten seconds before mind crushing boredom set in. Not on sperm swims in a circle. There are no “boss” sperm. And I'm uncertain what advantage purchasing the .99 cent version has other than insuring these developers continue destroying our civilization.

In summary, swim away from this one. It's no Angry Birds. Although an Angry Sperm game, perhaps…

We will return to our adventures in fertility!

Do you have a favorite mobile game or app? Or a process/theory/method of fertility tracking?

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